EW, HAG: Surprise, b*tch.
I bet you thought you'd seen the last of me.
I’m back! Thanks for your patience. Let’s go!
Growing up, we didn’t have a huge collection of VHS cassettes or DVDs, but that wasn’t an issue. In fact, it was preferable. Physical media takes up a lot of space that most single-family homes can’t accommodate while housing a few humans. We had the essentials that we knew we’d come back to, but everything else was rented from Blockbuster or borrowed from a friend (libraries are friends). It was a different system of consumption, with less urgency and more accessibility to media (something I did not anticipate saying in 2024), never mind the occasional scratch or skip.
Writing this feels like I’m keening about the good old days, lamenting how this generation will never understand. But the current struggles to access shows and movies are birthing a slow, methodical migration back to DVDs, Blu-ray, and whatever other format out there. Whether it’s for aesthetics or practicality, the sentiment in abandoning digital and streaming seems to have floated to the surface as worries for the future of internet-based content sink our stomachs.
This notion has been bouncing around the frame of my television since moving into our new house back in June. Internet was spotty in the days following, but I had a DVD/Blu-ray player and a couple handfuls of movies to enjoy. I had not a single care for connectivity for hours and it was a vacation of sorts. It was a little taste of the days when you couldn’t be reached if you weren’t near a landline. You know, if you could still scroll TikTok while away from a landline.
Now, on my mission to bolster that supply until rental stores make a bigger comeback (I’m spoiled to have Videodrome just a short drive away), I’ve made a list of must-have horror—some from my childhood, some never owned.
I’ve only owned this on digital so far (yes, I understand. I know. Thank you.), but the movie I thought would be part of my Bava phase has become a staple. “Javutich” rings through my mind every now and again, so it looks like I’m doomed to serve Asa Vajda for eternity.
The Disney opening will always crackle a little in my mind because of how worn this VHS was. Fun fact: Sarah Sanderson was one of many spooky sexual awakenings.
I have the first one and am now determined to collect the franchise in order of importance (to me). Next up, 5cream.
I was so pumped to see Matilda’s Miss Honey get dirty! Matthew Lillard in glasses! Shannon Elizabeth! It’s so early-aughts it hurts, but the makeup and effects are wildly satisfying. Fun fact: As a kid, I couldn’t look at the screen when The Jackal was on.
But where do you go to stock up? I asked around and found a few different places. Where do you get yours? Remember, hoarding info about physical media will bring you seven years of bad luck.
Barnes & Noble, for better or worse, has become a brick-and-mortar beacon for physical media, and has decent deals as well as Criterion Channel picks. The selection is breathtaking.
Gruv comes recommended by a few different people based on price and selection. Godspeed.
Vinegar Syndrome is cool to explore for both familiar titles and the next B movie obsession. Their Drive-In Collection can’t be matched.
Arrow Video, as you may have seen on social media, releases LEs and exclusives that horror fans champ at the bit for. This is my “special treat” site.
Shout! Factory is kind of the same vibe as Arrow, with a slightly different selection.
It’s been a minute, and I wanna tell you what I’ve seen since we last spoke! The reasons behind these rankings (favorite to least favorite) are personal and sometimes nonsensical. Please do not yell at me.
Longlegs. Maika Monroe is at her best yet, and I deeply appreciate her depiction of a neurodivergent woman. As an afab person who can’t tell if my neurodivergence is nature or (lack of) nurture, it was a comfort to see that representation. On a lighter note, please make all serial killers look like a wax museum’s Marilyn Manson atrocity.
The First Omen. Friends, I have not stopped thinking about this film since seeing it in theaters. Visually stunning and textured in its storytelling, watching this felt like unearthing a long-lost gem from the OG Omen years.
Maxxxine. Fun with a capital F, and deliciously bloody, I was satisfied with the ending to Ti West’s trilogy. But only satisfied. I’m here for the allusions and references to ‘80s slashers and the clear love for giallo.
Trap. Josh Hartnett’s still got it. Oh my god, you don’t even understand what seeing him in this role did for my heart. The story? Great premise, decent execution. I can’t stop thinking about Scott Mescudi’s wig.
The Exorcism. Not to be confused with The Pope’s Exorcist, the other Russell Crowe exorcism film from 2023, this exorcism movie is about making an exorcism movie (inspired by events that occurred during filming for The Exorcist). Awesome. Beautiful, even. The execution, however, left something to be desired. This may be my summer bummer.
It was a Satanic panic summer! Rainbow Black by Maggie Thrash offers a fictional account of what happens to a preteen whose parents are convicted of running a Satanic cult out of their daycare. Satan Wants You dives into the book, Michelle Remembers, and how the author and his client ignited the Satanic panic of the ‘80s and ‘90s. All I can say is, holy bullshit.
You could be listening to the EW, HAG podcast right now. Each month I’ll release an episode in conjunction with the newsletter to take a deep dive into something I touched on here. There’ll be interviews, recs, rants, and more!
This month I’m joined by Tori Potenza to gush about our favorite summer releases and activities! Tori just got back from the UK’s FrightFest, where they appeared in a new documentary.
While I was away, a couple other very cool, very queer horror newsletters surfaced! You should check them out, too! Each offers something different and engaging for readers and skimmers alike.
The Horrorverse Newsletter is written by Bee Delores and Brett Petersel
Skeletons & Whatnot is written by Andrew Keahey
In case you forgot, I’m a poet, and I’ve been published a few times this year. Click through for the latest to support your local off-putting writer friend.
“Thrifted” was published by Gabby & Min’s Literary Review
“Heliophile” was published by BarBar
“Lolita Laughed” and “Dicking Around” were published by new words {press}
These poems are important to me as they address CSA (trigger warning) and my self-destructive behavior before seeking therapy. For this reason they’re published under my full name, Blayne Hessinger Waterloo. I can’t put to words how much easier it is to breathe after writing these pieces.
Thanks again for coming back! I’ll continue to mess with formats and content until I’m happy with it. It’s cathartic to return to something that makes me feel like I know what I’m doing and I matter. Life got weird(er) and hectic the past few months, and I forgot how much making this newsletter and creating in general energize me.
So here’s your gentle reminder to make time to enjoy yourself and be yourself. No one is going to do it for you.
Also! The next newsletter will go out on a Monday (October 7) as originally scheduled.
